Vote Nathan!

Metaphor of a Maniac

2008-11-04T08:26:00.000-08:00

There was a deep woods, full and black. In these woods there was no light, only unshadowed. The dimmest recesses contained no life, but for the fir trees, whose fallen needles had long since scoured the earth of any other growth. On rare occasion, birds would enter these woods. They never stayed long. There were no fruit or nut bearing trees, and so there were no seeds or nuts for them to eat.

Deep within these shadowed and lifeless woods lived a boy, a boy surrounded by darkness. Never had he known the light, save for fleeting glances in the most dead patches of land. Over time he began to blame the light for the darkness, cursing it's name.

But nothing scared him more than when he thought.

After he had cursed the light, exhausted and left hoarse, he would lay amongst the roots, in a bed of rocks and dead pine needles, and he would think. And he would dream. And in these dreams, the demons danced. Orchestrated by symphonies of death, the demons danced through his head, owning him as the ballerinas of Russian lore might own a stage. Owning him the way the shadows owned the woods.

Owning him, as the darkness made it's way into his mind.

How do you know

2007-04-06T21:51:00.000-07:00

when God is calling you to a specific task?

If all you have to go on is a strong feeling that you should do something, does that mean you could be called to do it, despite nervousness or being unsure as to mechanics?

Quotable Quotes part 2!

2007-03-07T06:27:00.000-08:00

Alan Beck: "When my mother was a girl..."
--
Katherine McLean: "I don't consider preaching work because you're preaching God's word."

John Stevenson: "Well, if you were a full-time mom, but you loved kids, would you not consider that work, then?"

Stephanie Connolley: "Or do you not consider it work at Old Navy since you love doing that?"

Katherine McLean: "I don't understand!"
--
Alan Beck: "Back in my day, they didn't think Alice Cooper needed to hear the gospel"

Nathan Clarke: "Well they shouldn't have had to, his father was a Baptist minister"

Alan Beck: "Nathan, you of all people should know that that shouldn't be the case"

Nathan Clarke: "Well my father isn't Baptist"
--
Alan Beck: "I have no sense of humour"

Katherine McLean: "Are you ticklish?"
--
Nathan Clarke: "Tyler, give me MORE [quotable quotes]!"

Tyler MacDougall: "Mahalalel"

Nathan Clarke: "Give me GOOD ones!"

Tyler MacDougall: "Shut up!"
--
Nathan Clarke: "You can lead a horse to water, but a warped puzzle will only lead a blind man to suicide."
--
Thomas Marshall: "We're not talking the Saturday night love, where your a man, she's a woman, you're both horny- that's not love."
--
Katherine McLean: "If Adultery wasn't a sin, I would have done it a million times already!"

I should probably update

2007-02-09T20:51:00.000-08:00

So I think I'll talk about what's happened since Robbie and James have gone to Ontario.

...

Well...

Everyone... got sick? I did as well, but probably more seriously than everyone else since it's caused an entire change in personality. I mean, since when does Nathan do dishes for people who did nothing for him? Since when does he give up his seat multiple times during a movie for new people coming in? Since when does Nathan take pity on the sick?

Something is rotten in the state of Denmark.
Or rather, the College of Maritime Christians.

Other things that have happened since James and Robbie have been away:
John's shaved the inside of his legs;
There's been an exodus to Bulk Barn;
We've watched The Three Musketeers and The Fox and the Hound;
Katherine's called everyone bigger than her "obese";
'The Girls' have become phobic of syphilis;
Shannon pet some old guy's mustache;
Nathan's made fun of Hamilton quite extensively;
and probably much, much more that I've forgotten amidst the excitement.

Moral of the story: James and Robbie must never again leave; next year, it's Nathan and Darrell gone to Ontario.

A brief lesson in English

2007-01-21T15:10:00.000-08:00

1.
It is not pronounced crueler, it is cruller, the way it is spelled.
There are two L's in it, and both must be pronounced.
Cruel = Krool
Crull = Krull
Someone who is more cruel is crueler.
A type of donut is cruller, pronounced krull-er.

2.
This is a donut:

This is a doughnut:

3.
Aunt is pronounced Ont, not Ant. There is a U in there, learn to pronounce it.

If you wish to speak American, I am fine with that, just don't refer to it as English. If you failed English, do not try to tell me that I am wrong. If you wish to make fun of the way that I speak, feel free, just remember that I am speaking proper English, and you are not.

I want to be the bad guy

2007-01-20T20:27:00.000-08:00

But I am destined to ever be the Hans Solo in my life; I can be a jerk by times, but when it comes down to it, I'm just an emotionally immature person with an over talkative conscience. It's a good time, really.

Just once, though, I'd like to be the fighter, the vigilante, the justice who knows no bounds. I want to hurt people because they've hurt others. I want to fight for what is right, with the ends justifying my means.

I want to be Daredevil.
I want to be Frank Castle.
I want to be Bruce Wayne.
I want to be Peter Parker.

I want to do what is right, but appear to be doing wrong. I want the satisfaction that comes from hurting for something you believe in. I want the passion to continue the chase where others have fallen. I want. I want. I want.

But do I need?

Back at school.

2007-01-11T13:35:00.000-08:00

Back with friends.
Back with 'work'.
Why never forward with something, or at something?
Interesting.

Keepin' it together...

2006-12-21T19:19:00.000-08:00

Even when it's not easy.

Christmas is fast approaching- like, three days away, fast- and I've still not wrapped, or even purchased, all of my gifts!

I've been to work a couple times with dad, and it's good times out there, even though it's hectic and pretty understaffed. There's quite a bit of stress floating around, since my parents are both in management, my sister's spending hours away from home everyday, and constantly asking for more time and money to spend with friends, and Nathan just wants to sit at home and relax with his family, like he used to.

Tough luck.

My friends are wanting to spend more time together, which I want to do, but it's hard with work and wanting to spend time with my family. I'd drop the job in an instant if I didn't need the money so bad for next semester. Sometimes it's even like I just want to curl up and cry, it's awful. Christmas isn't about sales, about shipments, about tills being plus or minus, or anything like that! Hell, it's not even really about Jesus; it's about having a good time so that pagans will want to convert to Christianity, and right now, we're not having a good time.

I'm afraid for my sister, that she'll get into things I thankfully managed to avoid in High School, but that not all my friends did. I'm afraid for my father, that one of these days he'll fall asleep behind the wheel, or at work, and something bad will happen; the human body was not made to be awake for 19 hours at a time every friggin' day, Dad. I'm afraid for my mother, because she doesn't deal well with stress (she's like me, and brings too much of it on herself); work isn't helping, and neither is her family and neighbours.

I'm even afraid for me; I've been feeling fine since I started living at the college, but now that I'm home again, my headaches have come back full force, with enough pressure to make even a KGB agent talk, and my intestinal pains have returned just as bad as they were before. Evidently Nathan Clarke wasn't made to be a family man.

I am thankful to be home, though; I mean, I love my family, and I love Christmas. I love my friends and I love life. Things are going great here, if you ignore everything else. My sister and I are getting along, I've not fought with either of my parents yet, and it's still been a fair age since I've cried, which means no Joseph'ing pour moi.

Nathan out.

Judgement is:

2006-12-11T06:02:00.000-08:00

-the cognitive process of reaching a decision or drawing conclusions*

-the mental ability to understand and discriminate between relations*

-the capacity to assess situations or circumstances shrewdly and to draw sound conclusions*

If a person is to judge, they are to place an amount of self-importance on themselves, to say that they are enough above the individual to make a decision based solely on what they can see. A judge should not uplift him or herself, but should uplift God, and should themselves be uplifted by the people, or even God, to show that it's not a matter of self-importance. To judge where you have not been given charge is an agitating moral masturbation, an action which gives only temporary satisfaction to those performing the action, and only disgusts everyone else.

* source

Quotable Quotes

2006-12-07T19:23:00.000-08:00

Jamie: "Do you have any idea how long it takes my body to digest poop?"

Nathan: "Digest? You eat poop?"

--

Robbie: "If she doesn't look fourteen then it's ok."

--

Samarra: "Go Tyler! Win good!"

--

Rebecca: "Samarra doesn't have shoulders, she has fat rolls!"

--

Robbie: "Teacher, Shannon's taking all the space!"

Shannon: "Robbie's taking all the colour!"

--

Nathan: "I'm a tank, grr..."

--

Sarah: "I was the biggest loner in high school!"

Tom: "True!"

--

Nathan out.

Proof God Answers My Prayers

2006-12-04T19:41:00.000-08:00

'Nuff said.

Nathan out.

I consider myself quite good at...

2006-12-02T18:43:00.001-08:00

Aggravating people.

For instance, I'm going to aggravate Vinnie by posting this picture:

Next, I shall annoy Tyler, John, and Samara with this:

And finally, I'll annoy my sister with this:

Nathan out.

Re-Connected

2006-11-20T20:28:00.000-08:00

So today I re-connected with some old friends of the family, and my Kindergarten teacher; I went to supper at Margaret and Roger Hickox's, and man was it good. Turkey, stuffing, turnips, potatoes, gravy, peas, carrots... and custard for desert. I haven't had a feed like that since thanksgiving, and even then my sister got the best cuts of everything (still mad at you, dad)!

It wasn't all food though; we got to hear a lot about their family, most of which I know, and some (well, one...) that Robbie knows. They talked about the college when my father and Bill went there (and unfortunately informed us that the actual heresy detector no longer exists... God rest it's soul, for I'm certain it had one), and Roger had a quite lengthy discussion with Robbie about music, which I think was a good thing.

The best part, came though when they said that they'd be doing the aforementioned meal every month for four to six college students, and that I'm in charge of arrangements (so you better stay on my good side, jerks!) for who goes when.

Now, I think this is pretty cool, for more than just the food reason (though that's a HUGE part of it); I get to see, at least once a month, people that I pretty much spent the first five years of my life with, and whom my dad's been friends with since he was in high school. They get the opportunity to minister through food, which is really something you don't hear of often. It's always ministry through music, through money, through preaching, et cetera et cetera, but what was the last time, short of a soup kitchen, you heard of a ministry through cooking? They spend time putting together (what I consider) an extravagant meal, they pick us up at the college, we go hang out at their house, and there's even talk of next time providing some type of entertainment during the meal, like a DVD of some sort! That's just epic, and I never call anything but myself that! Well, and one other person, but we'll save that for another time. >.>

In conclusion: old friends rock, especially when they can cook and like you and your college mates. O_O

Nathan out.

Borat

2006-11-13T08:58:00.000-08:00

So last night, myself and a few friends went to see Borat, and it was epic. That movie was incredibly offensive; in fact, it offended an entire country (just go to msnbc.com and search "Borat" to see!) and evidently the majority of the college.

Apparently the people who go here are LIEberals who believe in homosexuality being natural, all people being created equal (it's a good thing I have the exact same skills as everyone else!), and that poop jokes are behind them.

Come on, guys, why get offended over a movie? We're not supposed to take these things literally since, y'know, it's a COMEDY MOVIE, something designed to help us ESCAPE REALITY. If movies were designed to be taken literally, we'd be living in The World After Tomorrow, with Jurassic dinosaurs running around, Terminators killing every young punk or cop that got in its way, and I'd be able to shoot spears and ice beams out of my hands.

Some have said that we, as Christians, should avoid all negative things of this world; that makes sense, right, because we're better than the average person, we're above them. Jesus never hung out with people that were "lower class", and certainly never with people of obscene professions, like prostitutes, thieves, or tax collectors! Of course, following the logic that anything offensive or worldly should be avoided... why does anyone at the college talk to me? I mean, I'm a horrible person; all day, I make fat jokes, retard jokes, gay jokes, AIDs jokes... I enjoy mocking things, it's what I do. Everyone here laughs when I do it, but when Sacha Baron Cohen does it, mm-mm, no way. YOU JUST CAN'T SAY THOSE KIND OF THINGS, SOMEONE SOMEWHERE ELSE IN THE WORLD MIGHT GET UPSET!

In conclusion, I would just like to post this comic strip, I think it applies.

Apparently ya'll don't know me too well...

2006-11-07T20:49:00.000-08:00

I've been getting some fairly serious responses to my seriousness blog-poll-thing, which is really frustrating; IT WAS THE SET-UP FOR AN AWESOME JOKE-THING!

The plan was to get a bunch of random Yes' and No's, then come here and be all "Survey SAYS: NATHAN DOESN'T CARE, SUCKERS!", but no! You all had to go and get all philosophical and crap about it!

Way to ruin my fun, jerks!

>.>

In other news, Robbie is a doo-doo head.

With that said, Nathan out.

Because Fred asked...

2006-11-06T20:09:00.000-08:00

I miss my baby =(

An interesting question.

2006-11-06T18:46:00.000-08:00

Today in small group devotions, Fred posed an interesting question; "Where do you see each other in five years?"

All joking about jail and third marriages aside, it was actually quite the difficult thing to come up with. Everyone else could easily be placed, based on where they are now, but all were unanimous that I was nearly impossible to predict.

That made me start to think; I mean, I'm spending at least 7000 being here for just a year, and I have no idea if I'll be back next year or not. In fact, I have no idea, still, what I even want to do. There's things bouncing around in my head that would be fun, but I doubt I could make a career out of any of them.

I'd love to get into politics young, but that makes it next to impossible to "develop" a family, something I've wanted of my own for years. Psychology also seems like it'd be a lot of fun, but I doubt many would trust me inside their heads; heck, I don't trust me inside my head. Working in the church would also probably be a bad thing for me, since I'm probably the least PC person the world has seen since the last really un-PC guy!

I don't even want to consider an office job for a career, because, well, I enjoy a certain amount of free time, and a certain lack of restrictions. Anything else is just depressing. Maybe I could move to Deer Island and start working on a fishing boat... if, y'know, the industry there wasn't going under, that is.

I think what I'll do is, get Justin to move back East next year, and see about getting an apartment with him here in Charlottetown, and then we can get whatever jobs wherever, see what we like and what we don't; that way I can actually "dip into the cud", so to speak.

That's what I was planning on doing this year, but no, I had to be an idiot and spend money on school that I'm going to fail out of anyway.

Bah, Nathan out.

Vote now!

2006-11-05T20:50:00.000-08:00

Ok, so, I spent like... 15 minutes building a webpoll thing, only to have blogspot not accept the coding.

Man that was fun. *gag*

Anyways, I'll just ask the question and get the answers in the form of comments!

00tz!

So, who thinks I should be more serious about life? Y'know, like... everything, apparently? Who thinks I should stay as I am now (only serious when the situation calls for it), and who thinks I should be less serious?

ANSWERS PLEEZ2BMAKINGNAOW

Nathan out.

Argh!

2006-11-05T10:19:00.000-08:00

So I spent the better part of two hours last night going through every burned CD I own, looking for the one with the cracked version of photoshop on it.

Two hours.

I have a disc case that holds 100 CD's; not the CD Book kind, but the kind that stacks them. 100 high. I went through every friggin' CD in there, and all I found was music. Music, music and more music, all stuff that I already have on this computer from the DVD back-ups I made a while ago.

So then I went through the DVD back-ups again, thinking maybe I'd just forgotten to copy it over; nothing. Then I gave up and decided to install WoW on here, since I plan on going to Wal-Mart tomorrow and getting a new game card for it; halfway through installing it (there's five friggin' discs), I see that Jamie is online, so I jokingly ask him if he has a cracked photoshop lying around. He tells me to come upstairs.

Frig.

So I leave my computer installing WoW, and head upstairs; he's up there, running around Stranglethorn Vale (playing WoW) killing people, having a righteous time, y'know. He sees me walk into his room, and holds out a disc; it's a legit Photoshop install disc.

I wasted two frigging hours going through my own CDs again and again and again, then asking people online if they had copies, only to find out there's one that won't get me sued less than a minute away. So I head back downstairs after talking to him for a while about WoW stuff (mmm.... nerds....), and realise "Oh frig, I'm still installing WoW, and that'll be ANOTHER hour at least before it's done"; I wasted so much time last night, I could shoot somebody.

But I won't, because shooting people is bad.

Unless you're trying to convert them to Christianity, but then you have to make sure you beat them up in the name of Allah.

In conclusion; nerds have a hard time in college, so instead dedicate yourselves to working at Needs the rest of your life.

Nathan out.

I remembered this exists!

2006-11-03T20:02:00.000-08:00

So I'm gonna post something completely worthless, awesome, I love it!

So I went to see Santa Clause 3 today; don't ask why, because I really don't know. It was good enough for me to not want my money back, but bad enough for me to not want to buy it.

Not that I'd planned on that or anything. >.>

Anyways, yeah, Im posting on my new laptop, that's wicked cool... mostly Im just doing this because Elise reminded me about it... or something, I dunno.

And yeah, listen to this or else.

Nathan out.

College Fooseball FTL!

2006-09-12T19:03:00.000-07:00

So, today I made this blogspot because, well, everyone else at MCC has one, and Im nothing if not susceptible to peer pressure.

Or something.

Anyways, yeah, this first blog is about how people need to donate money to MCC for a new Fooseball table because, well, ours sucks. So bad is it warped, in fact, that today I have sacked myself twice; not just like "Oops, bumped the table with my yoo-hoo", but actually having pulled on the bar and had the handle come right off of it, endangering future generations of awesomeness.

A good time was had by all... except for me.